Tag Archives: good character

Clearly growling at gossip


Have you noticed how it seems like the world is a million shades of gray, and a clear sense of right and wrong is a fading commodity? People proudly pronounce how they are getting a divorce because they have ‘fallen out of love’, they look for ways to get assistance rather than be of assistance, or they sit around the dinner table as they criticize and gossip about the very people they claim to love or call friends.

As many of you know, our family participates in Bible Quizzing. This year, my three boys are each learning over 400 scriptures and my oldest is learning over 500. Daily, over 1200 scriptures are being recited for approximately three hours per day. My son said this year is our ninth year of quizzing. As the Word of God goes forth, faith and a resounding clarity of truth fills our home. All practicality says that doing this probably makes us more prone to discern things that are contrary to The Word, agreed?

Well, recently, my son left an event and was very disturbed. Someone had given him an earful about what someone else had done to him or her. He was genuinely concerned, and you could tell that he was a little fired up and that this person had swayed him about ‘the accused person’. We are very close, so I’m grateful he tells me everything. Now, while we are preparing to have dinner and are setting the table, here is my son telling me about what has happened. I’m sure this is a common occurrence in many family discussions, but for me it was as if an alarm was sounded and I was faced with a choice. Sure, I could have jumped on the bandwagon and been a listening ear under the auspice of ministry.

I know as parents, we spend years building our children’s confidence and self-esteem. Any parent in their right mind would not want to destroy that after years of effort, but did you know that clarity, boundaries, and even ‘no’ help define a child and make them feel more secure? After all, I do not want my children to be confident in doing wrong, or worst yet fall prey to living by the world’s definition of what is acceptable.
So, I chose to use this situation to show my son first hand that this is how gossip and division start.
In Matthew 5:23-24, it reads, “Therefore if thou bring thy gift to the altar, and there rememberest that thy brother hath ought against thee; Leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way; first be reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift.

Unfortunately, it does not say to go to everyone, except the person that you actually have the conflict. You certainly should not talk up the situation to try and build an army in your favor. It says, to go and be reconciled to your brother or to the one who you think has a problem with you.

So, I explained to our son that this was clearly gossip, and he needed to go back to this person and encourage them to go to the person with whom they have the issue.

Since that time, not only has it helped my son to detect and beware of gossip and sowing discord among the brethren, but also it has brought reconciliation and unity to all parties involved.

Again, this is scriptural and a promise in The Word of God. In Psalm 133, it clearly says, “Behold, how GOOD and how pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in UNITY! It continues a few verses down in chapter 133, “for THERE (IN UNITY) the Lord commanded the BLESSING, even life for evermore.”

I want my children blessed! I want them to know what true unity is and that it doesn’t come easily and sometimes you have to fight for it.

This is just one instance of how easily things can creep in and take up residence in your home. I recently had a virus attack my computer. I believe it came through a download of a template for a homeschool progress report, not your usual suspected threat. My husband to the rescue loaded anti-virus software on my system. The program scared us to death as it would literally growl each time it found something of harm.
Wouldn’t it be nice if our inner man would ‘growl’ each time something entered our minds that was harmful. Well, as parents, I think that falls under our job description.
In all of your efforts to love, it is still important to be a clear voice and sometimes even roar….

Lessons in OWNERSHIP from my 8-year-old neighbor…


Kenzie is a special girl who lives across the street. She has the appearance of a typical little girl, but when she opens her mouth, you quickly realize she is no ordinary girl. She is energetic, bright, bold, and can’t help but make her presence known.
T’was the night before the garage sale and we had a garage full of items that needed to be unpacked and priced before the big day. We told the boys that the proceeds of this garage sale would fund our vacation, so our family was full throttle OPERATION GARAGE SALE. Typically, if we are outside, then Kenzie will come over and today was no different. At first, I thought to myself, now is not a good time. In a matter of minutes and without being asked, Kenzie was unpacking boxes and saying, “Which table does this go on?” She helped us for several hours until her parents called her inside. The next morning, we awake at some dreadful hour to begin showcasing our treasures in hopes for a big turnout. Around 8 or so, Miss Kenzie comes over and says, “Good Morning Mrs. Tim, I’m here!” (She always calls me Mrs. Tim and I think it is so cute and besides I dearly love being Mrs. Tim.) She quickly appoints herself as the greeter and welcomes everyone at the end of the driveway, “Welcome to OUR garage sale!” She would help the customers and say, “Oh, you like OUR XYZ?” “Mrs. Tim, how much is OUR XYZ?” At some point in the day, Goldie escapes the house to join the sale and Kenzie exclaims, “Please excuse OUR dog.” From that point on, without being asked, Kenzie is Goldie’s playmate and sitter. “Goldie, come back to OUR yard!” OUR, OUR, OUR…… It seems like every other word that left Kenzie’s mouth was ‘our’. As we came inside and counted our cash, I could not help but think about what an amazing sense of OWNERSHIP this girl had. I thought to myself, she will make an excellent employee one day and I can’t even imagine what a great asset she would be to the church. These days when something is wrong, tendency is to point out the error or even worse…point fingers at one of our brothers or sisters. Why can’t THEY? Well, if THEY would just…
JUST Imagine…
Welcome to OUR church!
Please excuse OUR construction, or OUR Sunday School rooms. WE are growing!!
This is OUR awesome Sunday School teacher.
We love OUR children. We love OUR music.
You get the picture. The truth is ownership makes things happen much quicker than diverting or the alternative.
I’m going to try to be more like OUR Kenzie. Love and blessings, Mrs. Tim